When people hear the word “gay”, they either cringe in fear and disgust or an image in their head of an effeminate man who dresses trendy, styles hair for a living, and runs around yelling “You go girl!”.

This image, while sometimes true, creates a stereotype and does not describe the gay society as a whole.

When “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy”, which became a popular TV show for the Bravo channel, began to make its marks in gay history, I found myself bombarded with phone calls from straight male friends, boyfriends of girlfriends, and straight male acquaintances asking me to “make them over”.  I may be a snappy dresser, express a slightly effeminate personality and have a little swish to my hips when I walk, but I don’t have the innate superpowers of designing hair and decorating homes that everyone seems to think I, and all gay men, do.

I have my own personality with a love for clothes, a gentle heart, and no urge to learn how to cut and style hair. They were surprised and disappointed when I filled them in on my lack of abilities. I claimed I just must have missed that day of class in How to be a Homosexual 101.

The truth is, there are as many types of gay men as there are straight men. They come in as many colors as the rainbow flag that represents them has.

First, there are the “jocks” or “butches”. These gay men are what society would define as “straight-acting”. If they were to walk into the room, shake your hand, hold a decent conversation with you, then leave, you would have never been able to distinguish them from any other straight male. They enjoy sports, mechanics, blue-collar work, etc. The only thing separating them from the heterosexual males is their love of the same sex.

When it comes to being out of the closet, it varies from guy to guy, each with his own reasons and situations for being in or out. But the majority tend to stay hidden inside, way in the back, snuggled up with the winter wardrobe of 1996.

Next are the “in-the-middles”, the category I fall into. These guys, when walking into the room, will send up a little orientation question mark above over people’s heads. ‘Is he gay? Is he straight? He has a limp wrist…but it could be a broken bone.. What about that walk? It might be a sprain… but that boy has got some groove to his move… Is that lisp intended? Or is it an actual speech impediment? Is that Cher he is listening to?’, These are some the thoughts and questions that run through their minds when confronted with this type of homosexual.

With the new “metrosexual” lifestyle coming around(straight men who are in touch with their feminine side, choosing style and substance over sports and grunting), it is making it even harder for others to discern the difference between the “in-the-middles” and the “metrosexuals”, creating a fun and rousing game of “Guess Who’s Gay!”.

“In-the-middle”’s likes and dislikes vary as well, with some leaning towards football and cars, others towards manicures and Martha Stewart. A well-rounded type of homosexual, but still not the stereotype of sashes and chiffon.

The last genre of gay I am going to go over with you, even though there are many, many more out there, is the “queens” or “fairies”. Extremely feminine, these guys you might think of as a woman trapped inside a man’s body. When they walk into a room, everyone inside, including the blind, would know that person’s orientation. They go beyond blatantly obvious with their feathery boas, huge platform shoes, and shiny glitter, breaking the stereotype of gay one would normally have and creating a new, even more extreme one. It may seem that they would be the perfect candidates to do drag, but not all of them do it. They prefer to still be boys who like boys, but keep their…softer aspect in life. As for their likes and dislikes, they hang around the more feminine side of culture, very rarely taking a step across the line of masculinity.

These are just a few examples with minute descriptions regarding the homosexual male and his ways, a 4-1-1 to those who read this paper and are naďve of the gay culture. I am in no way mad at people for assuming what my life style is like. They can’t help it. There just hasn’t been enough exposure to educate those with questions.

But times are changing, and we are slowly moving into a more open and acceptable world. To those who oppose homosexuality, and sometimes show it physically, just remember. We can be anywhere.