New Year's Dissolution ...

Amelia Gonzales, staff writer

As many of my devoted readers may recall, at the beginning of the semester I decided I would announce my new semester resolutions and share my results for the world to see.

Well, like so many, I wanted to lose up to 15 pounds before the summer. I sat in the very chair I am in as I write my results, feeling confident that I would succeed. Now, without further hesitation, I must inform you that I failed.

I lost five pounds, 10 pounds short of my goal. Now, the odd thing is that when I tried and failed before, I felt like a failure. This time, I don’t. What has made this time different?

This time is different because this time I shared. I shared my frustrations with will power, my frustrations with my workload, and, most importantly, my frustrations with my disappointments.

Most of the time, when I ate or craved an after-midnight snack, I realized I was overwhelmed with so much. Being a full-time student and devoting 40 hours to work every week was causing me to develop an I-just-don’t-care attitude about this whole weight loss issue. Before I decided to use this as an opinion piece, I just kept my weight, goal, expectations and dreams all to myself for the most part.

Every morning, when I would get ready for the day I realized I looked at my reflection as little as possible. This scared me intensely. I know I am a great person. I have a beautiful inner self, but I did not see the same on the outside. I couldn’t and didn’t want to become one of those overweight people who always felt sorry for herself or himself and indulge in a gallon of Rocky Road ice cream. I was, and am, better than that.

When the first issue came out announcing my goals and strategies, my co-workers thought I was crazy for sharing that. Throughout these past few months, they were the ones I spent much of my time with. They saw me try everything. They witnessed me shake with hunger and then continued to watch, as I clearly did not care to starve anymore.

The crazy thing about that is that I felt better eating what I wanted and not caring. I heard them, as well as others, tell me nearly everyday how awesome I was, that I had people care about and love me for who I am, and that it did not matter if I carried along some extra baggage. It took some time to realize that. It took even more time to realize that I am not a failure; no one is.

Sharing with anybody and everybody about my goals was a step in noticing that I wanted to try something. I realized, through sharing my goals, that I had much more support than I initially thought.

Now, this does not mean that I’m in any way giving up. I just did not meet the time limit I had given myself. Throughout this entire project, I learned several things, including that setting dates is a sure-fire way to lose confidence in your initial plan. Many people who set dates and don’t meet them give up the entire goal itself. To many, it’s a form of failure, and discouragement tends to lead to more problems.

So many people seem to focus on the problems in their lives whether it is weight loss, complexion, intelligence, or any other small factor in individualism. What about all the good things about a specific person, such as every thing that makes a person so great and the aspects that so many see? Focus seems to have ultimately drifted towards negativity and has left the positive in the gutter, so much so that doctors are appearing on national television trying to solve people’s problems in front of the world. There is not a single problem in the world that cannot be solved unless the person with the problem recognizes the problem.

My weight loss issue is something small that I seek. It’s not going to control my life or take over the greater aspects that make me who I am. All I can do is try to believe that failure is not something anyone should ever object to. As long as the word ‘try’ is in a person’s vocabulary, there is no room for failure