Mixing Up Morals: Cocktail Hour is Over

Brooke Heald, staff writer

I found that after living with five roommates who are of college age or attend college that we have lost all sense of our morals.

I remember when I was young and saw my granddad smoking. I’d cringe in disgust. Now, I smoke. Or when I heard my dad saying horrible words to my mother, I promised myself I would never let them come out of my mouth. Now, I say all those horrible words for fun at least 20-30 times a day.

Then I think of when I lied so much it would make my mom cry and ask why I disappointed her so bad. I was so ashamed of myself. Now, I lie to a lot of people I love or know very well, and I feel no remorse.

Even though I am now in college and live on my own, earn my own money and pick how I live my life, I still wish my mom was there to spank me or yell at me sometimes. Ever since I left home and moved out with other college kids, my life took a turn I didn’t ever want it to take.

When I saw my roommate almost hit his girlfriend, I noticed that guys have lost the greater level of respect for women. But, it’s not just the guy’s fault anymore. Compared to the 1800s, we, as young women, are like mice after a piece of cheese. We go insane over guys and let them talk us into doing things. Then we get into relationships and just take the horrible things they say, even though we know we don’t deserve it. Guys need to start respecting us and quit acting like they own the planet. But for them to do that, we need to keep ourselves covered a little more and act like we deserve to be respected. My opinion on this is very controversial, but it is something to think about.

When I started college, I thought it would be a party every weekend, than worrying about school when it came around. Well, I received a big slap in the face! I don’t want to say that drinking and smoking is necessarily bad, but it’s not good either, especially at this stage in our lives. My first weekend after school started I stayed out till 3 a.m. or 4 a.m. in the morning the whole weekend. I drank about 45 beers and smoked about eight packs of cigarettes. I went back to school on Tuesday. I was sick, tired and I walked around campus like an empty, lifeless person. I hated it. Last weekend, I went out but I went home at a decent time. I only drank two beers and smoked six cigarettes. I am proud of myself for once in a long time.

Plus, I started calling in sick to work so I could sleep all day, or because I stayed out the night before. Well, I almost lost my job, and it took a toll on my paycheck. I have rent and bills to pay. My roommates aren’t very reliable, so I always have to be prepared for anything. I would lie to my mom about going to work or studying because I didn’t want to disappoint her. This made me feel like the dirt between my toes. I decided to tell my mom the truth, and I did. I actually started studying and going to work so that way I wouldn’t have to lie.

I remember in high school when I would be with the cool “click,” and they would be cussing up a storm. I would join in just to receive their approval. Two days ago, my mom was about to bring my 9-year-old brother to my boyfriend’s house (where I was) because she needed me to baby-sit. My boyfriend has two roommates including one who has a trash mouth like nothing to joke about. When my brother arrived, this roommate said some very nasty things and didn’t even care that my little brother was there. It was even worse when I thought about the day before, and I was saying the same things. I left and took my brother to my house, because nobody was there and I wouldn’t have to worry about him hearing all that and asking me what those things mean. I’m cutting down on my dirty mouth and thinking about what I’m about to say every time I think I’m about to say a bad word.

I moved out of my house thinking, “Man this is going to be so easy!” I thought I wouldn’t have any rules, anyone to answer too. I wouldn’t have to do laundry until I felt like it, I wouldn’t have any chores and I could be as lazy as I want with no punishment. I have never been more selfish or wrong. The first week we moved in the dishes piled up, my laundry basket was overflowing, my room looked like a pigsty and I was becoming a bum that never did anything except eat, watch movies and sleep. My roommates were the same way and never did anything, so it only got worse.

I took a good look at myself and decided that this wasn’t the person I wanted to be or be known as. I made myself a chore list like my mom always did, started waking up at 7 a.m. on school mornings no matter what and I got to sleep a lot earlier. Now, I can look at my house and myself and smile because I feel like a respectable and responsible person.

 Responsibility knocked me on my butt when I moved out, started college, and got a job. I was thinking that I would have this fun-and-do-whatever-I-want kind of life without taking others into consideration. I’m responsible for my part of the rent, studying on my own time, and going to work as I’m scheduled. I figured out I am finally responsible for everything I do and need to have done. I don’t have mommy and daddy there to take care of me anymore. It gets really tough, but it made me a stronger and more reliable person. Now, when I don’t do something I knew I was suppose to, I have to take the blame for it and fix it. No more whining to get my way and the cute puppy face to keep me out of trouble.

I learned that my morals are really out of whack, and I needed to get them in line again. I went to church religiously for 17 years. When I moved, that changed. I sleep in on Sundays and I never glance once at my Bible that has my name so beautifully inscribed on it. I think this is a big reason I went downhill and why a lot of college students do. Next Sunday, I’m going to church, and I’m going to read my bible and refresh my mind on why I’m even here on earth and what my purpose in life is. I know I’ll feel much better and much more satisfied with my life and myself.

All I’m asking is for college students who might be like me to give this some serious thought. If you’re like me or worse, take the things I said into consideration. I want you to be as happy with yourselves and the way you live as I am.

For other people to respect you and believe in you, you have to first respect and believe in yourself. Don’t take college for granted. It should be fun and a wonderful experience, but don’t lose sight of your goals or how you should live your life.